new-old-me-mail-book-note-goo-fon-lu/hu-d
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has anyone else noticed how the time seems to be way off on here each time you add an entry? i have notice that for me anyway...well, anyway, i didn't come here to talk about time in particular
things have been a bit weird lately..i've been feeling out of step, non-existant, or the feeling of wanting to be non-existant..i hate this feeling..i still have fun, i still live life, i just don't feel like being in the mood for that..and how do i cure this? i don't really know..because by the time i get out of it, i don't realize that it went away, or how i got out of it exactly...but i always end back here
from here on out, we'll refer to christian as x, because that's what his friends call him, and christian is too much to type...anyway, x can tell that i'm depressed, i can push it aside and pretend everythings fine, like i usually do because i hate bogging people down with it, but he seems to see it still...even just over the phone, and i'm sure if we talked online he would know too....there was one other person from my past that could do that very well, knew my mood instantly, knew something was wrong, when i thought i was doing a pretty damn good job at hiding it
things with x are good, he went to a friends cabin this weekend, so i won't see him probably until sunday, other than that we've pretty much been together for the past week, i think he's pretty into me, and i know i'm pretty into him, i just feel a bit apprehensive because of the last 3 relationships i was in...well, kind of all of the relationships that i've been in...and a few other things, but it'll be okay..i'll be okay...this winter better be a good one..and this christmas better not be a bad one, it's the 4th year, i'm going to make this one right and break the "curse"